A Few Things I Learned This Year That Are Changing My Life
[Written in 2018]
The nature of thoughts is to constantly change. Like, duh. But the moment this really sank in, it had a profound effect.
When I’m in a low mood, my thoughts are low too—stressed, anxious, depressing. I don’t need to do anything about that, because of what I just said in the previous point.
If anything, what I can do is simply remember that these are just thoughts. Just because they’re there doesn’t mean I have to believe them.
If anything, feeling stressed or down is actually a good sign—it’s a sign that I’m caught in a thought storm, not that reality itself is stressful. And that’s also a sign that it’s best to let go a little. I may not be able to change how I feel in the moment, but I can choose not to act on bad advice from my mind and wait for the storm to pass. New thoughts will come, bringing better ideas. (This also means it’s not a great idea to make big decisions while in a thought storm.)
My experience of reality—meaning, my feelings—comes from the inside out. That is, from thought to feeling. We tend to think that circumstances, people, or even the weather make us feel a certain way. But it’s actually the other way around.
I have control over… nothing. Definitely not over other people. And not even over myself—not over my thoughts, not over my mood. Trying to control them is a massive energy drain and never actually gets me the results I want.
Nature has an unbelievable intelligence. The most incredible things in the world are also the most ordinary—sunrises and sunsets, rainbows, a baby being born (every single one of us was born, after all!). We recognize this when we look at nature, at babies, or at kids. But we forget that we’re part of that same intelligence. We are nature. That means we already know exactly what we need, what’s right for us, what we should do.
And speaking of nature—nature balances itself. Like how skin heals from a cut. What we don’t always realize is that this also applies to our moods and thoughts. Meaning, to the unseen part of us. The more we interfere with the natural flow of our minds—trying to force, fix, or overanalyze—the more we actually block the balance and healing that would naturally happen.
Awareness. Humans have awareness. That means that while I can’t directly change my thoughts or feelings, I can be aware that they are just thoughts and feelings—not reality. I can be aware that I’m currently in a thought storm, or that it’s my thoughts causing me distress, not my circumstances. And I can be aware that these thoughts will pass and new ones will come.
